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Writer's picturemikejd1

Tools: What are We Thinking?

A garage with a variety of power tools
Garage with Tools

I remember purchasing my first home. My wife and I lucked into a recent foreclosure that was in excellent shape and reasonably priced. Our new home was also in one of the most desirable neighborhoods in town so the potential resale value was high. As I had never owned a home previously, I quickly realized that a man must have the proper tools to care for his home. The first purchases were for necessary tools. Items such as a hammer, screwdrivers and a drill were of the most critical need. All homes should have these basic items. And make sure to buy quality as it does make a huge difference. After owning a home for a while I slowly added tools to my toolbox. Many of which are one offs. By one offs I mean that I used them for one job and do not foresee any future use. These are highly specialized tools, many of which I cannot name. So that's the basics of tools. But sometimes I, like many other men, purchase tools just to have them. A couple years back I bought a mechanics socket set. This set has over 200 pieces, of which I will use about 3. I bought it because I "never know when I might need it." So far I haven't. I own a Dewalt miter saw. I figured I needed one because everyone else has one and it would make me more of a man. Maybe tools are like furniture to a man. You know how woman will invite friends and family over to show off the new couch or display cabinet? Well, when our male friends come over we want to make sure that we have the proper tools displayed, many of which would probably kill us if we decided to use them. And just for the record I have used my miter saw and still have both hands and all fingers, much to my wife's disbelief. There are so many more tools that I continually salivate over. Mostly from watching This Old House. I would like to get a table saw and lathe. I'm not sure what I would do with it but I am sure I'd use them. One thing that most of these tools have in common are that they are loud. For some reason loud noises excite us men. It's probably while many of us are into guns and cars. Or is it the power? Who here hasn't squealed in delight when they see an F-16 overhead? I know I do. Don't judge. So I took this theory and applied it to tools. The louder the tool, the more desirable it is to men. Kind of the opposite of what we look for in a partner. Sorry ladies, but men tend to avoid loudmouth women. I did a quick search of the loudest tool and concluded that it's a hammer drill. Who doesn't like the feeling of grinding into brink or stone at 100dbs?! It's just the absolute best. I have used hammer drills and can attest to the fact that they evoke a sense of power. It also might remind of us of something but I'll leave that up to the experts to decide. So what is up with our tools? Many of them have become display pieces...or surfaces to put other tools onto. I'm not sure what is happening in our minds, much to the consternation of our better halves, but you never know. We might, just might, one day need that stubby nail eater. Probably to make up for something else that is stubby.



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