Sometimes when I have a lot of free time on my hands, which is not very often, I like to just sit and think. I go over hypotheticals, problem solve or just ruminate on life. During these sessions I often come up with some pretty crazy ideas. For example, I recently had a great idea for a television game show/reality show; a group of people attempt to break into and out of North Korea. The one's who succeed win a cash prize. The ones who don't make it, well, let's just say the the stakes are very high. But it would make for compelling television! A bit like The Amazing Race but much more realistic. And The Amazing Race never went to North Korea. Which brings me to a similar idea; a show like The Amazing Race but in dangerous countries. They could go to all sorts of places that have yet to be featured on the show. Cuba, which is not very dangerous, Somalia, Sudan, Yemen etc. A great challenge would be to dodge artillery fire and bombs! Sounds fun kids, doesn't it? Another idea that I had, and this could be a real money-maker, would be called rent-a-kid. It could be for a family whose child needs a friend for a while, a parentless couple, or maybe couples that are thinking about having a child but aren't sure if they are ready. Everyone would be properly vetted of course. How about rent a grandparent? We can take lonely grandparents and rent them out to families that have lost their loved ones. It would be an absolute win win situation. Something that I would truly enjoy is a people wash. Let's say you go down to your local car wash establishment and while your car is being pampered, you enter a separate, private tunnel and have your entire body scrubbed while going along a moving walkway. You won't have to do any of the work and at the end you can have hot Norwegian women towel you off. Now THAT would make a lot of money. And on certain days you can get a free wash if you pay for one car wash. An absolute steal! Something that would truly come in handy are private, self cleaning restrooms that are stationed in all major cities and medium sized towns as well as along highways. You would pay a set dollar amount and you can poop and pee in private within a sparkling clean restroom. For an extra fee you can have a wall mounted screen play the latest athletic contest of any program of your choosing. What about a theme park full of sets from the shows that we grew up with (I'm 41 so basically shows from the late 80's early 90's). Do you remember Salute Your Shorts. So you can camp with Ug and Donkeylips! For a nominal fee of course. Or Legends of the Hidden Temple! What forty year old wouldn't want a chance to run through the obstacle course? How about a Goonies adventure tour? You can relive the movie and visit all of the locations. It can be a bit like an escape room but a much longer version. This one would be a bit pricey but well worth it. What about a reverse strip club? In this venue the girls stay clothed and you come in, disrobe and have money thrown at you. I don't know about you but the idea of having money thrown at me sounds like an excellent idea. I have so many great ideas, I'm thinking that I'll have to make this a two part post. I'll leave you with a really good one. A game where a serial killer is released from prison and a group of people have to outrun him or her. Like a game of hide and seek but much more exciting! We could fence off a couple of acres of woods and provide basic weapons to the participants. If the killer is able to "find" all of the participants, then he is freed from prison. If not then he will suffer the consequences. On second thought, this may be too extreme, even for me. Oh, I know how to leave on a high note. Remember American Gladiators? So we have an obstacle course that people can pay to go through, and it's based on the classic athletic contest! So we could have joust, the ring one (name escapes me), the climbing wall and the best of them all, the shooting one (again, the name escapes me). And if you win the final challenge, you get a night with one of the female gladiators. Now if that isn't a reward, I don't know what is. Stay tuned for part II!
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